Paradigm Shift

Peace Corps Volunteers are strange.  Let me elaborate.  As you have no doubt heard we go to the ends of the earth to parasite and disease infested lands where we learn tribal languages and talk about bodily functions far too openly regardless of the circumstances, and constantly fantasize about all things food and drink related.  But this isn’t why we’re strange.  I could just as easily have been describing the peculiarities of fraternity life.  No Peace Corps Volunteers are strange for an even more bizarre reason but I’ll get to that in a minute.  First a story.

Once upon a time this bright young lad named Garrison went to study with the Nobel Peace Prize nominated Theatre visionary Augusto Boal.  Garrison was intrigued by Boal’s techniques for using theatre for third world development work so he thought that, as a natural step after college, he might join the Peace Corps to give it a try.  Now after several grant projects investigating Boal’s techniques and a show at the SF Fringe Festival in his style, Garrison felt fairly qualified to do this… Welcome to the Peace Corps Garrison. “Wow this is really going to happen,” he thought.  You will be studying a minority language called Serere spoken only in rural villages in the delta region.  “Okay this shouldn’t hinder me doing theatre locally right?” He hoped.  We’re having a girls’ camp in the region and we would love to have some help doing skits “Fantastic let me talk to everyone putting this on and show them that theatre can be so much more than skits” He pleaded.  Well there are too many people helping at the camp so how about you just work with the girls for an hour on the first day and then for an hour right before they present their skits on the last day.  Oh yeah and you can’t lead the sessions in Serere.  Does that sound good?  Meanwhile the girls will be working every day for an hour and a half on their skits.  “Well I guess I can do some games or something” he sighed.  Perfect people love theatre games; they’re so fun and won’t get in the way and take time away from the important work.

… cringe…

I don’t really know what I expected.  It’s hard enough getting theatre people to understand the benefits of Boal’s work let alone PCV’s with every background under the sun.  I was still more than a little disappointed though when the planning meeting for the girl’s camp made it quite clear that my skills were neither wanted nor necessary.  As strange as it sounds to me I don’t know that I will be doing any theatre whatsoever during my service in the Peace Corps. 

So get to the point, why are PCV’s so strange?  Hold up, more about me first.  My service is shifting.  I see now that the things that got me into the Peace Corps aren’t necessarily going to be the things that keep me here.  My service is simply not lending itself to exploring Theatre for development work.  I am overwhelmed by projects, all of which are too legitimately needed for me to justify taking away my attention to pursue something else out of personal curiosity.  There is certainly a part of me that’s just avoiding the work because it’s hard.  Excuses are wonderful express routes to the easy track.  Even so I stand by the work that I am doing and I simply can’t justify going out of my way to pursue something else… even if it’s pure gold for grad school applications… 

This is how we are weird.  Not only are we in the most absurd situations, but every decision we make comes down to trying to get the most, not for ourselves but for someone else.  Everything is about how much impact I can have on my village, how much I can increase their food security, how much I can help reduce the labor for the women’s group how much I can increase their overall level of sanitation etc… It’s quite a paradigm shift.  Now let me stop you before you start thinking that we’re little altruistic angels, cause we’re not.  This shift is a normal product of our situation.  The Peace Corps yardstick by which we measure our self worth and success just happens to be based on how much we help other people.  Different situation different yardstick.  So don’t go comparing apples and oranges saying we’re so delicious and you’re so bitter, although we are rather delicious, but that a topic for another time.    Still though it is a strange shift to have one’s sense of self worth so completely wrapped up in other people’s wellbeing and success.  Maybe this is what it feels like to be a parent… or a grown up…  or a human… or a walrus… I don’t know. 

The point is things are shifting for me and it’s making me think about all those pesky big life questions.  Should I pursue international development work after PC?  Can I justify just becoming a professional actor? Where am I really going to be able to have an impact?  Luckily I’m also reading the Douglas Adams’ Hitchhiker’s series right now so I know not to take any of these questions too seriously.  The Earth will probably end up blowing up regardless of what I think. 

Living up to the title of this blog, this post took on some serious thoughts of one PCV in such a way that hopefully you walk away with only a slight feeling of discomfort, which will ultimately turn out to be completely unrelated and will go away shortly after a few more hours of digestion. 

…see what I mean?  Way too much Douglas Adams right now :-)

Cheers,

Garrison 

P.S. In the spirit of non-bitterness here is the link to the girls’ leadership camp fundraising page.  It is still going to be a really valuable experience for all involved, so do chip in if you have a few bucks to spare. 

https://www.peacecorps.gov/index.cfm?shell=donate.contribute.projDetail&projdesc=685-163

Welcome to Peace Corps Senegal!

This one's for you new stage.  Welcome to the wonderful land we call Senegal.  Before you get your hopes up too much let me give you some bad news: no zebras, no giraffes, no wildebeests, no cheetahs, no elephants.  If you're in the delta region we have hyenas but you will never see them.  If you're down in Kedougou apparently there are lions... but no one ever sees them either.  But if you're in Kolda you might see a hippo.  Yes you are going to Africa but it is not the Africa that most people think of.  Welcome to Senegal's Africa

Here in Senegal you can buy the latest appliances from all over the world, including top of the line plasma flat screen televisions. 

Can't live without the latest iPod or Macbook?  Well you're in luck we've got um :-)

You've probably heard horror stories about eating bland meals of rice and fish for your entire service.  Fear not, just pick up a box of name brand cereal at your local mega grocery store.

Ah yes but you're getting here right before the hot season so food isn't really the biggest part of your worries.  When that mercury hits 120 degrees just swing by the American club for a dip in their fabulous pool.

As you can see we are also really up tight here and have zero fun whatsoever. 

And we are always one hundred percent integrated.  No afternoons of softball with pulled pork sandwiches, beer, and relaxing under a giant American Flag tent.  Nope not for us Peace Corps Volunteers.

Is he serious you may ask? Well yes and no.  Dakar will be Dakar but you've caught me being flippant, and while we can vacation to the land of the nice, the reality of life here, much like the latrine above, is a little shittier.  I'm telling you this for two reasons.  First to assuage your parents' and your fears that you may be going to an utterly desolate and poverty stricken third world country.  We always have Dakar!  And also to prepare you for the utter bizarreness of living in a country with such a disparity between the haves and the have-nots. 

Senegal is poor don't get me wrong, but you are not going to a country where people die of starvation or where the population is devastated by AIDS.  The majority of the country functions fairly well.  Albeit usually without the most basic of amenities, but Dakar is a good sign.  You probably won't agree when you get off the plane and drive through Rufisque to Thies, but things here are on the up and up and there is great potential for Senegal to break into a prosperous period of sustained economic growth.  There are cell phone networks all over the country, internet cafes are numerous and reliable, roads are improving, electricity is spotty but expanding none the less, and most importantly more and more people are going to school meaning that Senegal's workforce will soon be able to tackle bigger and better things.  This ain't the Peace Corps of the 70's so fear not parents or significant others, your PCV will not disappear off the face of the earth for two years. 

I've only been in country for about 7 months but this arrival stuff is still fresh in my head so let me offer a few words of advice.  Everyone's experience is different though so take this with a grain of salt.  My first couple of weeks in country were really difficult.  Read my first blog entries, they were down right neurotic.  I missed home like crazy, felt like I would never be able to learn the language, was absolutely terrified of Thies and Dakar and just wanted to go home to my girlfriend.  Top it all off with a feeling that everyone else was adjusting better than I was and I developed a wee bit of a sense of inadequacy.  So first piece of advice: PST is hard so don't make it harder by being hard on yourself.  Cut yourself some extra slack and realize that even if people keep it together on the outside, they all freak out at some point.  Freaking out is beyond perfectly normal.  Talk to your fellow PCT's if you're having a hard time with something, chances are they're going through it too.  We're a family here, don't forget that.  Second piece of advice: the language will come.  Every single person in Peace Corps Senegal passes their language exam by the end of PST.  Study but don't stress about it.  Third piece of advice: Your CBT site family is not your family for the rest of your service.  You are allowed to make mistakes with them.  Most of them have had volunteers before and they have seen it all believe me.  Go ahead and butcher their language, forget their names, hide in your room because you don't want to talk to them, cross some unspoken cultural boundary, do it all.  This is the one time here where you truly get a free pass.  You get to make the right first impression with your real family so don't worry about this one. 

Now let's talk about something taboo... ETing (Early Terminating).  Yes if things get too much you can call it quits at any time, pack up and go back to America.  Three people did it in my stage during PST.  Yes it is an option, but please don't do it.  You may feel like you can't do this, that two years is just too much.  I am here to tell you though that yes you can do it.  I have never met you but I know that this is the truth.  Peace Corps selected you so trust that you are qualified enough even when, inevitably, you feel like they made a mistake and that you are absolutely incompetent.  You can do this!  We are a family and we will support you through thick and thin.  This is a two way street though and we need you.  Many times current volunteers fill out requests to set up new sites so that they will have a Health or EE volunteer with whom to collaborate.  I can't tell you how disappointed my sub region would be if our health volunteer never showed up.  Magnify that by 10 and that's how the village will feel if they never get the volunteer they've prepared for.  I don't mean to put extra pressure on y'all, but we need you.  I'm not going to lie, I wanted to go home during PST, but I made a promise to myself that I would stick it out until I got to my real village and now here I am.  PST life is NOT what your life is going to be like for the rest of your service. 

There is a light at the end of the tunnel, and its not death, its a village with a family and an incredible two year adventure that will change you for the rest of your life.  Welcome to Senegal my friends.  You're going to do great!

The last day at my CBT site.  You will make it there too!

P.S.  I made the mistake of staying awake on the drive from the airport to Thies.  It's really not worth it.  There is just two much to process and it really isn't the most flattering view of Dakar.  Trust me you are better off sleeping than trying to take it all in and inevitably freaking out.  You'll see Dakar again soon don't worry.